"Sorry, Wrong Dept,: That's Microsoft, Not Microsoft"

This one is golden: today I get a SPAM relayed thru 65.54.173.13 (take a
second and resolve that). As standard practice, I send a SPAM form, which
explains everything, complete with nice little, simple and easy to understand
check boxes. At the bottom of this form is a verbatim copy of the SPAM, which
includes of course it's full headers. I'm the postmaster of the mail on this
machine, eg, this is my mailserver and I handle the mail, so there is no doubt
about the connecting host who relays it to me. Beyond that, those headers can
be spoofed by the Spammer, but what lines my own MTA adds are 100%. In short,
I got a SPAM from a Hotmail server- wouldn't you think ab...@hotmail.com would
be the people to notify of this, as it lists in the whois info for that IP
address?

Not so, not in the Microsoft mind!

Here's the reply these jackasses sent back:

From ab...@hotmail.com Tue Sep 27 19:03:26 2005
Date: Tue, 27 Sep 2005 16:03:21 -0700 (PDT)
From: MSN Hotmail <ab...@hotmail.com>
To: jayjwa@(this host)
Subject: Abuse: SPAM From 65.54.173.13 And Spammer Email Box Needs Closing:

Unfortunately, we cannot take action on the mail you sent us because
it does not reference a Hotmail account. Please send us another message
that contains the full Hotmail e-mail address and the full e-mail
message to:

ab...@hotmail.com

Using Hotmail:
1.  Click "Options" to the right of the "Contacts" tab. The "Options" page appears.
2.  Under "Additional Options", click "Mail Display Settings". The "Mail Display Settings" page appears.
3.  Under "Message Headers", select "Full" and click "OK".
4.  Forward the resulting mail to:
       ab...@hotmail.com

Using MSN Explorer:
1.  Open the message, and then click "More" in the upper right corner.
2.  Click "Message Source". The message opens in a new window with all the header information visible.
3.  Copy all the text and paste it into a new message. Send this message to:
       ab...@msn.com

Using Outlook Express or Outlook:
1.  On the unopened mail, place your cursor over the mail, right-click, and click "Options".
2.  Under "Internet headers", copy the contents of the full header.
3.  Open the e-mail in question and forward a complete copy of the message, including the full message header you copied at the beginning of your message, to:
      ab...@hotmail.com

If you're not a Hotmail member, consult the Help associated with your
e-mail program to determine how to view complete header information.
Then forward the message to:

ab...@hotmail.com

If the unsolicited junk e-mail or "spam" comes from a non-Hotmail
account, you can send a complaint
to the service provider that sent the mail. Make sure that you include
full headers when you send your complaint.

In the full header, look at the last "Received" notation to locate what
.com domain it came from. It looks something like:
    [service provider domain name].com

Forward a complete copy of the message, including the full message header, to:
      abuse@[service provider domain name].com

If the domain does not have an abuse service, forward your complaint to:
      webmaster@[service provider domain name].com

All Hotmail customers have agreed to MSN Website Terms of Use and Notices(TOU) that forbid
e-mail abuse. At the bottom of any page in Hotmail, click "Terms of Use"
to view the Terms of Use document in its entirety.

Thank you for helping us enforce our TOU.

LMAO- bay5-f13.bay5.hotmail.com is NOT a Hotmail server? Maybe it's a "Yahoo"
server then, or maybe from "Comcast", since it says "HOTMAIL.COM" in the
hostname!

whois 65.54.173.13

OrgName:    Microsoft Corp
OrgID:      MSFT
Address:    One Microsoft Way
City:       Redmond
StateProv:  WA
PostalCode: 98052
Country:    US

NetRange:   65.52.0.0 - 65.55.255.255
CIDR:       65.52.0.0/14
NetName:    MICROSOFT-1BLK
NetHandle:  NET-65-52-0-0-1
Parent:     NET-65-0-0-0-0
NetType:    Direct Assignment
NameServer: NS1.MSFT.NET
NameServer: NS5.MSFT.NET
NameServer: NS2.MSFT.NET
NameServer: NS3.MSFT.NET
NameServer: NS4.MSFT.NET
Comment:    
RegDate:    2001-02-14
Updated:    2004-12-09

TechHandle: ZM23-ARIN
TechName:   Microsoft Corporation
TechPhone:  +1-425-882-8080
TechEmail:  n...@microsoft.com

OrgAbuseHandle: HOTMA-ARIN
OrgAbuseName:   Hotmail Abuse
OrgAbusePhone:  +1-425-882-8080
OrgAbuseEmail:  ab...@hotmail.com

OrgAbuseHandle: MSNAB-ARIN
OrgAbuseName:   MSN ABUSE
OrgAbusePhone:  +1-425-882-8080
OrgAbuseEmail:  ab...@msn.com

OrgAbuseHandle: ABUSE231-ARIN
OrgAbuseName:   Abuse
OrgAbusePhone:  +1-425-882-8080
OrgAbuseEmail:  ab...@microsoft.com

OrgNOCHandle: ZM23-ARIN
OrgNOCName:   Microsoft Corporation
OrgNOCPhone:  +1-425-882-8080
OrgNOCEmail:  n...@microsoft.com

OrgTechHandle: MSFTP-ARIN
OrgTechName:   MSFT-POC
OrgTechPhone:  +1-425-882-8080
OrgTechEmail:  ipr...@microsoft.com

# ARIN WHOIS database, last updated 2005-09-27 19:10
# Enter ? for additional hints on searching ARIN's WHOIS database.

MSN, Hotmail, M$: = Microsoft. If they're inferring that it should have went
to ab...@msn.com instead of ab...@hotmail.com, that's nuts. Why waste time
replying to my mail; forward it yourself to your other department- they work
for M$, not me. That's like them reporting something to me, and I say, No,
sorry! That came from my second computer, not my first computer: you have to
use abuse2@whatever not abuse1@whatever. The MSN guy is likely across the
hall, or in the next damn cubicle.

They also preceed to tell me how to use freak'in OutLook to send email, at the
bottom of my emails is my .signature, which contains a huge "LINUX" logo and
an anti-MS slogan....

Normally I'd just ban persons that are this clueless, but I've got a few
friends that are (unfortunately) stuck on these accounts.

--
:: 11 Minutes :: The average survival time for a new
Microsoft Windows XP computer connected to the
Internet before it gets compromised/infected.